Nightwoods

Oh, I love LibraryThing's Early Reviewer Program. I am not exactly lucky when it comes to winning things, so I was happy to get one of the 25 books 1230 readers requested - 2% odds, and I can be one of three in a drawing and lose every time. Lucky me this time. Free books for the courtesy of a review are among the best things to happen to me in the last 5 years.  I'm looking forward to reading Charles Frazier again, it's been a long time since I read Cold Mountain and I know that man can write.

I love a story set in the Carolina Mountains, and I love a strong, interesting, complex female character. Vicki Lane and Kathryn Magendie are two fine writers in this genre as well, and I love their work. I was overdue for another good mountain read, so I was very excited when my book arrived yesterday.

This story reeled me in from the first pages, as the main character, Luce, grapples with raising her murdered sister Lily's strange children alone in a remote, abandoned resort lake lodge. Intriguing story - check. Great writing - double check. Chapter One just spoke to my heart over and over again. I wanted to sticky note about four passages; I wanted to memorize whole paragraphs of prose. I'm going to try to pace myself, to make it last. And I'm going to share some of the words, just in case they might speak to anyone else.  Enjoy.

.......

  Also, the children were here, and what was Luce to do? You try your best to love the world despite obvious flaws in design and execution. And you take care of whatever needy things present themselves to you during your passage through it. Otherwise you're worthless.


........


  WHEN SHE LIVED ALONE, Luce didn't go to the upper floors often, but not out of fear. Not really. It was little but bedsteads and cobwebs up there, and she didn't want to believe in ghosts or anything similar. Not even the portents of bad dreams. Yet the fading spirit world touched her imagination pretty strong when she was awake at three in the morning, alone in the big place. The dark sleeping floors, with their musty transient pens and cribs for the guests and their help spooked her. The place spoke of time. How you're here and then you're gone, and all you leave for a little while afterward are a few artifacts that outlive you.


  Case in point, old Stubblefield, who had owned the Lodge for the past few decades. Luce visited him several times during his dying days, and she was there at the end to watch the light go out of his eyes. In the final hours, Stubblefield mostly cataloged his possessions and listed who should get what........ The silver candleholders were a heavy weight on Stubblefield's mind because his wife had loved them so much. Oddly, he left them to Luce, who didn't love them at all and probably never would.


  Easy to be disdainful and ironic toward other's false values. Still, Luce hoped that when she was at the same thin margin of life she would be concerned with looking out the window to note the weather or the shape of the moon or some lone bird flying by. Certainly not a bunch of worn-out teaspoons. But Luce was half a century younger than old Stubblefield, and didn't know how she'd think and what she would value if she made it that far down the road. All her life, the main lesson Luce had learned was that  you couldn't count on anybody. So she guessed you could work hard to make yourself who you wanted to be and yet find that the passing years had transformed you beyond your own recognition. End up disappointed in yourself, despite your best efforts. And that's the downward way Luce's thoughts fell when ever she went upstairs into the dreary past.


.........


Luce opened envelopes at random, reading until she reached a sentence where it became impossible not to become critical of Lily's fatal hope and trust in other people. Everybody Lily met was so wonderful, and the shiny future stretched forever. Every page held evidence against her. Luce never made it all the way through any of the letters before she returned them to Lily's precise folds.


  Luce decided not to read them again until she could appreciate them more. Some far day when she had become a better person and could feel something besides stinging anger that her beautiful, gentle sister had not protected herself more carefully against a world of threat.


........


Maybe it's just me, but I needed to read some of those words right now. Sometimes books find you at exactly the right time.


I've had a reading drought since I burned out on the Game of Thrones bricks months ago, so I'm ready to read again, something with a soul and a purpose. Hope this one primes the pump and I get my reading mojo back. My to be read pile is not getting any smaller, and I'm not getting any younger. So off I go to bed with a book, and a head full of thoughts from the bit I've read so far.

Happy reading, and happy weekend.

Lake Effect On a Clear Day

On a clear day, from atop my neighborhood hill, I can see the Sears Tower, now the Willis Building, from 43 miles away.  It's a fuzzy zoom, but it's just to the right of the water tower in the center.

This week, cool fall air met warm lake air.

A mountain of clouds covered the eastern horizon.

These are not storm clouds, just warm air from the lake.

The clouds covered the entire length of the lake, from North to South, too vast for a camera to capture.

It was a beautiful and humbling sight, realizing that the lake made a mirror image of itself in clouds,

while we watched from clear skies miles away.

I couldn't look at the view without hearing Barbra sing this song.

Hope you enjoy the view and the voice.

Paying Attention

My photo OCD is in overdrive, again. 

I'm hoarding memories in pictures, but I'm OK with that.

Everywhere I look there is something Amazing to notice.

Attention must be paid.

I can't trust my memory, I need the pictures.

Happy little surprises are everywhere.

Some a little sad, maybe, but still Amazing.

Some are adorable, at least to me.

A million little universes everywhere....

Full of sublime, fragile beauty.

Paying attention makes me happy.

Calm.

Hopeful.

And even in the mundane, late night dog walks,

there are still surprises to discover.

Early morning dog walks, half asleep, grass wet and sticky,

there are still Amazing things to see, hear and smell. 

(I guess I should be more grateful for the dog.)

So when I'm not rushing around, 

stressing out,

driving in my car,

feeling older than my years,

and hurrying through my life,

I try to remember to 

slow down and look around.

To pay attention and look for the next

Amazing Thing.

to cross my path.

It's the least I can do for myself.

Hope you get to pay attention 

and have Amazing things find you too.

Soggy but Safe

The Delmarva Peninsula is home to what remains of my family. I've watched the news from the balmy Midwest and worried about their safety during the latest storm of the century. The Delaware and Maryland families are fine with minimal tree loss, and they didn't lose power until daylight, which is a small blessing. The Virginia clan is fine, but likely flooded, as they live on the skinniest part of the tail of the peninsula, and the storm hit at high tide. These things have happened before, they will likely happen again. Hopefully not any time soon. Everyone is safe, which is all that truly matters.

Hurricane Irene wasn't as mean as she could have been, but she sure was huge. We've had more than a few jokes about the name of this storm, as my mom's Aunt Irene was as huge as she was cranky, and she was slow moving and scary, too.

Delaware, Maryland and Virginia didn't get much media coverage in the wake of the big storm, but that's OK. We never could compete with the Jersey shore or big cities, and more importantly, we never wanted to. The winds and rains weren't as awful as everyone was prepared for, which is a blessing when you live a few feet above sea level. There were a few homes damaged by tornadoes, a few downed trees and some power outages, but all things considered, my family was lucky. They're soggy, but relieved. I'm relieved, and maybe a little guilty, enjoying some of the best weather of the year, thanks to the high pressure Irene has kept pushed over us in the middle.

Hopefully the flooding will be minimal in the upper states as Irene marches slowly and dissipates.

In the calm after the storm, I wish for many lovely mushrooms like these found after our last downpour.

Hope you and your loved ones are all safe and sound.

I'm going to miss you, Target

I have already transitioned away from all things Koch Brothers (Angel Soft, Quilted Northern, Soft N Gentle, Brawny, Dixie) because these mega-rich brothers lobby for and fund policies I find ethically, environmentally and socially reprehensible. But now I have to stop shopping at Home Depot and Target too??? Ok, it hurts, but I will do what I can to stop funding the madness. I'm going to miss you guys, but your politics suck. Target not only donated to Michelle Bachman's political campaign, they support anti-choice and anti-gay policies. And if you know me at all, you know I think Bachman makes Palin look normal, and I love my freedom of choice and my gay family and friends.

Lest I offend any of my handful of readers, I claim no membership in our two party system. I love the Constitution, especially the parts that ensure life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, and I'm pretty taken with the separation of Church and State part too. I'm a moderate, a libertarian (according to the political affiliation quiz I took), and most importantly, the grandaughter of a woman who resigned from the Daughters of the American Revolution because of their racist policies in the 1950's, a woman who fiercely loved this country, and taught us to do the same. It's important to have some standards, and if corporations are using my dollars to support policies that undermine the ideals my ancestors fought and died for when they built this country, the very least I can do is shop somewhere else. I hope you do too.

Big business special interests have no place in politics. I'm pretty sure the founding fathers would agree.

Big Corporations Donating to Conservative Agendas

If you'd like a little more nausea with your morning coffee, you might want to know a little about ALEC, the American Legislative Exchange Council, where the Koch Brothers, lawyers and state legislators meet to craft legislation for proposal at the state level that is pro business and anti everything else I hold dear - consumer protection, environment, worker's rights, - you know, the usual screw the regular citizen and keep the rich rich bullshit. Currently under investigation by the IRS for abuse of non-profit status, and despite their claims, there is nothing non-partisan or transparent about what they are doing. Again, I'm pretty sure the founding fathers would beat these people with a cane if they could.

ALEC Exposed

That's enough political outrage for one morning. Have a nice, earthquake and hurricane free day.